Here I am. Again.

And that is why I hate myself so much.

Because I just don't learn.

Yeah, I know, I'm daddy's little princess, and all... And when I was a kid I got a lot of stuff (toys) but it didn't fill me. I was searching more. Maybe kindness... Warmth... I dunno..

Still those things follow me.

I always have to get something, even though I haven't figured out the whole situation (meaning I might be sad/depressed about something, and that would be the reason to want something new)

I hate when I'm greedy, thought I'm not.. or that's what I feel.

I always fuck up everything.. With my family, friends and relationship.. Even with my pets.
Yeah.. How fucked up can I be.

I just have to learn it the hard way.

The miss celebrity

You lightly just wrote that you can't make it, thought last night you begged me so hard to keep company.

It's okay, I've endured this before. It's fine. I'm not sad. Really.

Though one time, it was me to back off and you shoved me away.

Said I wasn't sorry. How could you know, huh?

Is it that I have to be the one who get's to suffer, though you say you are the victim.

I don't even know anymore. But still you are the dearest friend I have ever had.

And I hope you still will be.

But hopefully you understand. Someday.

I'm childish, stupid and know nothing about the world but still...
I'm jealous of your new friends (once again) but you know,
I though you knew me.